AVEC LES COMPLIMENTS D’UN MOINEAU A L’AIGLE AMERICAIN

Publié le par thermosurvivor


Très cher Marijn

 





Tant de sollicitude, jamais démentie, mérite bien un petit « compliment » en retour. Aujourd’hui, Team Thermo prend sa plus belle plume pour toi cher président !

 

Voici bientôt deux ans que certains de tes dévoués collaborateurs ont eu la lumineuse idée, avec ta bénédiction, d’augmenter les profits en rayant de la carte d’Etat major Thermofisher notre beau site industriel de Château Gontier. Comment les blâmer ? Au siège de Boston quelqu’un saurait-il placer notre ville sur une mappe monde?


La géographie n’est pas leur point fort n’est ce pas Marijn? Eux ce serait plutôt les mathématiques, même si souvent ils aimeraient que 2 + 2 rapporte bien plus que 4 et qu’il faille montrer aux actionnaires que cela pourrait faire 6 ou 8….en soustrayant une usine peut être ?

 



Mais ne nous égarons pas, je reprends mon compliment Marijn.

Tu n’oublies jamais de nous donner des nouvelles de la santé financière du bateau Thermofisher, et Dieu sait qu’elle est bonne! Toujours la même délicatesse dans tes délicieux E Mail personnalisé, on y annonce des profits records, on félicite les braves soldats, et l’on n’oublie jamais de rappeler qu’il ne faudra pas faiblir afin d’alimenter sans relâche ces bons vieux fonds de pension sans lesquels, finalement, nous ne saurions que bien peu de chose ! Sache que ces informations rafraîchissantes et ces remerciements sincères sont transmis à tous les employés de notre usine depuis deux ans.

 





En lisant ton dernier envoi (voir ci-dessous), ces performances record, ces profits historiques, arrachés en pleine crise économique mondiale, Team Thermo en avait les larmes aux yeux....oui vraiment.

Tu précises bien qu’il s’agit d’une croissance organique, c'est-à-dire sans croissance externe donc sans l’aide de nouvelles acquisitions....probablement à la « force du poignet » ou à la sueur de ton front à moins que ce ne soit grâce à quelques fermetures…..mais c’est admirable, magnifique, inouïe, Marijn.

 



Cependant, ôte nous d’un doute Marijn, tu es bien au courant que Château-Gontier est maintenant une usine fantôme de 17 000 M2? Tu sais que nous vendons au plus offrant les équipements et matériels restant? Tu blêmis? Ne t’inquiète pas Marijn, les derniers euros de cette liquidation, avant fermeture définitive, iront grossir les résultats de Thermofisher…bien sûr, il n’y a pas de petits profits…. et puis nous savons comme la vie sera difficile en 2009 alors garder un train de vie élevé ne doit pas être une mince affaire !

 

Ainsi nous aurions contribué aux nouveaux succès historiques dont tu parles dans ton MAIL ? Sûrement, puisque tu continues à prendre la peine de nous abreuver de ta prose financière !

Mais alors c’est incroyable! Nous autres Français de Mayenne devons être diablement productifs Marijn car, vois tu, en toute modestie, nous n’avons pas forcé notre talent ces derniers temps….alors imagine notre productivité passée! Tu en aurais presque des regrets… grand sensible!

 





Soyons sérieux quelques instants Marjin, s’il te plaît, pour ces dernières semaines, raye nous de la liste de tes destinataires lorsque tu enverras tes E Mail dégoulinant de fausse affection et de remerciements déplacés. Nous sommes latins Marijn, tu le sais quand même ? Ne nous gère pas à « l’anglo-saxonne » Marijn, et si l’envoi de tes E Mail vers Château-Gontier c’était de l’humour, alors, définitivement, nous n’avons pas le même ! Tout cela est de très mauvais goût Marijn.

 

Chaque projet porte un nom….tes collaborateurs avaient choisi « sparrow » pour la fermeture de Château-Gontier, alors Marijn……tu as les compliments des moineaux de Château-Gontier!

 

Pardon pour le tutoiement Marijn mais dans les groupes Américains on se tutoie tellement facilement….Team Thermo a pensé que tu apprécierais

 

 Au plaisir de ne plus te lire Marijn !

 


PS
Toute ressemblance avec un personnage réel n'est pas fortuite et le texte ci dessous est un MAIL officiel personnalisé ("X" est en fait le prénom de chaque employé) expédié par le sus dénommé Marjin!
Ce MAIL pouvant choquer des âmes sensible en période de récession, Team Thermo à délibérément choisi de ne pas le traduire en Français.


Dear “X”,

Today we released our fourth quarter and full-year earnings for 2008. I am pleased to report that Thermo Fisher Scientific finished the quarter and the year in a strong position, despite the unprecedented turmoil that we – as well as our customers and suppliers – are confronted with in the world economy. Our revenues – the total value of the products and services we delivered in the fourth quarter – grew 1% to a fourth quarter record of $ 2.65 billion, with 4% organic growth. Our adjusted operating income – a measure of our profitability – increased 9%. And our adjusted earnings per share (EPS) rose 16% in the quarter. For the full year, we had 5% organic growth, and our revenues grew 8% to a record $10.5 billion. This is the first time in our history that we surpassed the $10 billion mark, and it is truly a milestone that we can be proud of. Adjusted operating income for the year grew 14%, and we expanded our operating margins by 100 basis points, which led to adjusted EPS growth of 19% in 2008.

I want to thank you for your Intensity in meeting your goals, which enabled us as a company to meet our goals and deliver this strong performance for the quarter and the year. Our commitment to customer excellence and our belt-tightening efforts are paying off, thanks to your hard work in both these areas. Our Customer Allegiance Scores (CAS) show that we are making steady progress in improving our customers' experience. As they – like everyone else – struggle to remain competitive in this difficult market, we are ideally positioned to help them.

Despite this strong finish for the year, however, I want to caution that we face a very difficult year ahead. The reality is that nobody is immune from the current downturn, which is why we need everyone's full commitment to helping Thermo Fisher succeed. The good news is that we are better positioned than many. Two-thirds of our revenues come from recurring sales of consumables and services, which tend to hold up better in a tough market. Thanks to our diversified portfolio and our tremendous global reach, we can deliver the products and services our customers need.  With our strong cash flow, we also have the resources to continue to invest in the business for growth, by developing new technologies, expanding in growing markets or making acquisitions that complement our existing offerings. And last, but certainly not least, our customers continue to look to us for innovative tools and solutions that help them streamline their processes, operate more efficiently and thus be more competitive.  In the current economic climate, the ability to stay out in front of the pack is more important than ever – for our customers and for us. Consolidation is taking place in nearly all industries, with the front-runners coming out on top. Being the world leader in serving science is a very enviable position to be in.

We can – and should – look back on the past year, and congratulate ourselves on a job well done. But our focus must be on the coming year. As you set your goals for 2009, ask yourself which of your processes you can improve, how you can go the extra mile to make our customers' experience even better, what you can do to expand your own skills and expertise, and how you can increase efficiency and productivity. Use our PPI tools to help you!

In tough times such as these we can all be very proud of the strong foundation we've built for Thermo Fisher. Our 4-I values are the cement in that foundation. They are what bond us together as a winning team. They will help us weather this storm and emerge even stronger. Take a moment to remind yourself of what each of our four values – Integrity, Intensity, Innovation and Involvement – really mean and how you can exemplify them. They are highlighted below. By maintaining our team spirit, our focus on our customers and our commitment to our values, I'm confident that we, as a company, will remain out in front of the competition. Thanks for all you are doing. Keep up the good work!

Best regards, Marijn

 

 

 

WITH THE COMPLIMENTS FROM A SPARROW TO THE US EAGLE

Dear Marijn





So much care, never wavered, deserves a little "compliment" in return. Today, Team Thermo takes his best pen for you dear president!

For nearly two years, some of your most devoted colleagues, with your benediction, had the bright idea to increase profits by drawing the maps Thermofisher this great industrial site of Château Gontier. How to blame them? At the Boston headquarters is there someone able to point our city on a World Map? Geography is not their strong skillness isn’t it Marijn? They would rather prefer mathematics, although often they would like 2 + 2 reported more than 4 and need to demonstrate to shareholders that it could be 6 ....By subtracting a plant…may be?

But let’s come back to the subject, my personal compliment for you Marijn.
For two years you never forgot to give us news about the financial health of the vessel Thermofisher, and God knows they were great! Always a delicious delicacy in your personal E Mail! It announced record profits, it congratulated the brave soldiers, and it never forgot to remind, gently, that we shouldn’t be weak to feed these good old pension funds, without which we finally are such poor little human being! Be aware that these refreshing information and your heartfelt thanks are systematically sent to all employees of our factory.


Reading your last transmission (see bellow), the record performance, these historical profits, torn despite a world wild economic crisis, brought tears in Team Thermo's eyes.
You say it was an organic growth, without external assistance, which means without further acquisitions, just to "muscle power" and probably with some site closures….but it’s incredible, magnificent, Marijn?






However, deprives us of a doubt Marijn, you are well aware that Château Gontier’ factory is now a ghost of 17 000 M2? You know that we are now selling to the highest bidder the remaining equipment and materials?
You turn pale Marijn? Don’t worry, the latest euro from this sale will increase Thermofisher accounts as we all know that life is difficult in 2009 especially if one has to keep a high standard of living….not an easy task!

Thus we would have contributed to new historic achievements? Certainly as you thanks us in your E Mail. But then it's amazing! We, French people from Mayenne department, must be highly productive Marijn because, you see, with modesty, we didn’t push our talent too far in recent times ....so, imagine what was our previous productivity level! Don’t regret Marijn, you are too sensible!

Let's be serious a few moments Marijn! Please, for the last few weeks, erase us from your list of recipients when you will send your E Mail full of false affection and displaced compliments. We, Marijn, are Latin people, don’t you remember it? Do not manage us in an “American way” Marijn, and if sending E Mail to Château-Gontier reflected your sense of humour, then definitely we don’t have the same! This is very bad taste Marijn.

Each project has a name ....Your colleagues chose "sparrow" for Chateau-Gontier closure, then  Marijn, you have the compliments of the Chateau-Gontier’ sparrows!


  It will be our pleasure not reading you anymore Marijn!

PS
Any resemblance with a real personage is a delibarated decision and the text bellow is an official personalized MAIL ("X" is the first name of each employee) sent by "Sir" Marijn
This MAIL could hurt sensible souls in a recession economical period, so Team Thermo chose to avoid any translantion to French.

Dear “X”,

Today we released our fourth quarter and full-year earnings for 2008. I am pleased to report that Thermo Fisher Scientific finished the quarter and the year in a strong position, despite the unprecedented turmoil that we – as well as our customers and suppliers – are confronted with in the world economy. Our revenues – the total value of the products and services we delivered in the fourth quarter – grew 1% to a fourth quarter record of $ 2.65 billion, with 4% organic growth. Our adjusted operating income – a measure of our profitability – increased 9%. And our adjusted earnings per share (EPS) rose 16% in the quarter. For the full year, we had 5% organic growth, and our revenues grew 8% to a record $10.5 billion. This is the first time in our history that we surpassed the $10 billion mark, and it is truly a milestone that we can be proud of. Adjusted operating income for the year grew 14%, and we expanded our operating margins by 100 basis points, which led to adjusted EPS growth of 19% in 2008.

I want to thank you for your Intensity in meeting your goals, which enabled us as a company to meet our goals and deliver this strong performance for the quarter and the year. Our commitment to customer excellence and our belt-tightening efforts are paying off, thanks to your hard work in both these areas. Our Customer Allegiance Scores (CAS) show that we are making steady progress in improving our customers' experience. As they – like everyone else – struggle to remain competitive in this difficult market, we are ideally positioned to help them.

Despite this strong finish for the year, however, I want to caution that we face a very difficult year ahead. The reality is that nobody is immune from the current downturn, which is why we need everyone's full commitment to helping Thermo Fisher succeed. The good news is that we are better positioned than many. Two-thirds of our revenues come from recurring sales of consumables and services, which tend to hold up better in a tough market. Thanks to our diversified portfolio and our tremendous global reach, we can deliver the products and services our customers need.  With our strong cash flow, we also have the resources to continue to invest in the business for growth, by developing new technologies, expanding in growing markets or making acquisitions that complement our existing offerings. And last, but certainly not least, our customers continue to look to us for innovative tools and solutions that help them streamline their processes, operate more efficiently and thus be more competitive.  In the current economic climate, the ability to stay out in front of the pack is more important than ever – for our customers and for us. Consolidation is taking place in nearly all industries, with the front-runners coming out on top. Being the world leader in serving science is a very enviable position to be in.

We can – and should – look back on the past year, and congratulate ourselves on a job well done. But our focus must be on the coming year. As you set your goals for 2009, ask yourself which of your processes you can improve, how you can go the extra mile to make our customers' experience even better, what you can do to expand your own skills and expertise, and how you can increase efficiency and productivity. Use our PPI tools to help you!

In tough times such as these we can all be very proud of the strong foundation we've built for Thermo Fisher. Our 4-I values are the cement in that foundation. They are what bond us together as a winning team. They will help us weather this storm and emerge even stronger. Take a moment to remind yourself of what each of our four values – Integrity, Intensity, Innovation and Involvement – really mean and how you can exemplify them. They are highlighted below. By maintaining our team spirit, our focus on our customers and our commitment to our values, I'm confident that we, as a company, will remain out in front of the competition. Thanks for all you are doing. Keep up the good work!

Best regards, Marijn

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